I must admit that I am not always right. Of course, I did not understand these dynamics until after entering the world of marital bliss. Although I may not always be right, I'm willing to "fess up" to it when somebody graciously points this out to me.

Fortunately, for me, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage has made this the supreme priority of her life. Moreover, I must say, I am all the better for it. I, on the other hand, have made "fessing up," the supreme priority of my life. This has made for a wonderful team.

Most people do not know when they are wrong. Nobody tells them about it so they just go their way in the wrong direction doing the wrong thing.

I take comfort in the unexpressed fact that I may not always be right, but then, on the other hand, I am not always wrong either.

I did not fully understand how this affected me personally until an incident happened this past week. It's funny how one little incident can bring your entire world i...

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On Monday last there was a confusing cacophony swirling all around me. Usually, I'm not one to give vent to the noises around me but this was a little different. I like to pick sides but this time I'm not sure who to root for. Perhaps you can understand the confusion I am facing.

It is like being a Gator fan in Bulldog territory.

This uncertain sound has confused the dickens out of me, and it isn't even Christmas time.

Looking out our living room window, I spotted the source of all this commotion. It was a yellow school bus filled with children on their way to their first day of school. As I watched the bus turn left and disappear out of sight, I thought about how the same incident can have completely opposite reactions.

First, there was the loud "hurrahs" of parents all through the community rejoicing in the commencement of school. Either, my hearing is getting better or the sound is getting louder, almost deafening. Up and down our street parents we...

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Some of my best friends, on occasion, have hinted the suggestion that it is highly possible that I might be paranoid. When this idea was first floated, I smiled because I had no idea what it meant. Now that I know what it means it has given me pause to consider... finding a new set of friends.

Let it be known that I am not paranoid but the facts are quite clear that there are certain forces "out there" which have it in for Yours Truly. This is not being paranoid, it is simply the facts, ma'am.

If I have any sanity left, it is no thanks to my computer. I firmly believe that one crazy man surrounded by 12 little dwarfs makes all computers in one place. Sure, they all carry names like HP, Dell, Aspire and other such, however, let me assure you, this is all a ruse and is part of the conspiracy.

The crazy man has it in for me. Any sanity I might have had in those thrilling days of yesteryear has been systematically and permanently destroyed. And the crazy man, of ...

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When a person has reached the ripe old age I have reached there are precious few pleasures left. Actually, there are many pleasures left but no energy to pursue them and if I happen to catch a pleasure, I can't remember what in the world I'm supposed to do with it.

One pleasure has been by my side for more years than I care to remember. No matter what the circumstances I may be in at the moment, I can always count on this pleasure to lift my spirits and paint a grin on my mug. Of course, if the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage catches me with this pleasure I have some real explaining to do.

This is where my wife and I paddle separate canoes.

The pleasure I am referring to has created more discussion – or maybe I should say monologues – in our home then just about anything else. I'm for it and she's against it. In all reality, her arguments against it, at least in verbiage, far outweighs my argument for it.

When you come right down to it is very diff...

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During my high school career I was no thespian, however, I could act the fool when called upon. My friend was the thespian and starred in our senior high school play, "Finian's Rainbow." One of the musical numbers was, "When I'm not near the girl I love,
I love the girl I'm near."

I have altered this title a little to fit my own needs. My version goes, "When I'm not in the season I love, I love the season I'm in." It is a wonderful motto and has solved quite a few problems down the years. Just don't ask me to sing it for you. I can, but you do not want to hear it... believe me.

At my age I have learned a thing or two. One of the things I have learned is that you might as well be content where you are at because that is where you are. All these people that are jumpy and nervous because they are not exactly where they want to be, waste a lot of precious time and energy.

I am old enough to appreciate where I am at. I could bemoan the fact that I'm not somewhe...

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I had just snuggled down into my easy chair for an evening of reading and relaxation. I was reading a book I had just purchased and was quite anxious to get into it. The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage was dutifully going through the daily newspaper. She tries to keep up on the news while I try to escape the news. She is more successful than I am.

All of a sudden, I heard from her side of the room, "I just can't believe this."

I tried to pretend I did not hear it and went back to my book.

"Of all the ridiculous things in the world," she said as though she were talking to somebody other than me. I pretended she was and continued my reading hoping that was the last of her outbursts.

Then I heard, "Aren't you listening to me?"

It was then I knew I had to put my book down and find out what all the consternation on her side was about. Some things you can ignore and then some things you better not ignore. My wife comes under the latter.

"...

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The older I get, and I plan to get as old as I can, I am amazed at how monotonous things really are. When I was young, everything seemed to be so new and exciting and I looked forward to the next new adventure.

Now that I have a few years under my belt, along with a couple thousand lunches and suppers, I am in a position to have a better perspective of life. And I have noticed that all the important things repeat themselves over and over again.

I bought a brand new suit a couple of weeks ago. I could not wait to wear my new suit to church with everybody saying, "Is that a new suit?" And I will reply, "Yes, this is my new suit. How do you like it?" Therefore, the conversation that Sunday revolved around my brand-new suit. I must confess it is better than when the conversation revolves around a black eye. No matter how many times I explain my black eye, people do not believe I ran into my doorknob.

But a new suit is a different thing. I enjoyed everybody talkin...

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The past week was an unusually quiet week around the parsonage. It enabled me to do something that I have wanted to do all summer long. Nothing. I am not bragging or anything, but I can do nothing right up there with the best of them.

The week, as all weeks do, started on Monday. For me, there is always something about a Monday morning. And this Monday morning was going to set the tone for the rest of the week.

It all began when the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage made one of her announcements. I live for these announcements, because I know it will affect my whole week.

"Our daughter and I," she said rather matter-of-factly, "will be going out of town for the entire day on Thursday."

This came as a rather shock to me for I had not been forewarned. And you know what they say about being forewarned. However, I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. I will take what I can take when I can take it.

Apparently, our daughter was going to tak...

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As the last firecracker sizzled in the night, I heaved a sigh of relief. It is not that I do not enjoy a good firework display, but after all, when you have seen one firecracker they are all just about the same. The thing they all have in common is they cost money. That is my problem. Blowing up bushels of dollars in the air does not seem very exciting to me.

But the Fourth of July celebration has a different meaning for me. Certainly, I revere and celebrate the patriotic significance of the Fourth of July and faithfully pray for my country and our leaders. That is just one tiny aspect of my observance of the Fourth of July.

One reason I look forward to the Fourth of July is so I can look backward and say, "Well, I am glad that’s over." And truer words have never dribbled from my lips.

The prized significance of the Fourth of July celebration for me is that it is the last holiday of the summer. I may be wrong here, but it seems that every month has some kind ...

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The Fourth of July is upon us and nobody enjoys a party more than Yours Truly. I will offer any excuse to break into some kind of a party mode. The slightest hint of refreshments and I have my "these-boots-were-made-for-walking" footwear on and I am ready to go.

I especially like birthday parties, when it is somebody else's birthday, that is. I have found when it is my birthday party too many people want to congratulate me on another milestone in my life that I do not get a chance to enjoy the delectable refreshments. Smiling and stuffing the face do not go together.

But a patriotic party is something altogether different. It is the birthday of our country and it is hard to imagine anybody celebrating too much on this anniversary. Over 230 years ago, give or take, this country came into being. And what a country it has been.

Do we have problems? The only people without problems are those resting quite peacefully at Boot Hill. If there is life, there are probl...

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